Around the first of this month I decided to abandon my old childish libertarian views because I realized most of us were too stupid to handle real freedom and have been very active in my local chapter of Citizens Against Too Much Unfettered Freedom. Winning political arguments against libertarians is easy but not many of us state lickers know how to do it and be effective. We tend to try and use court historical perspectives, lopsided statistics, and newspeak to these lolberts to no avail. They always come back with more data or philosophy to counter it and it’s a waste of time. Instead there’s a great method I like to call the “Against Grandma Argument.”
Good o’l Grams
My grandma is a sweet little 84 year old widow and is living on Social Security and the retirement money she gets from her late husband for his service in the Air Force in WW2. She makes out a meager living but it’s good enough for her and she is happy. Now if these anarcho-libertarians got what they wanted she’d be out on the streets with no where to go and no money to eat. She will eventually starve or die if she doesn’t get her heart medication; which ever comes first. They spend so much time trying to dismantle the state and end my poor grandma’s existence. It’s unconscionable and evil.
So now when I get these liberty-loons trying to convert me back using the non-aggression principle I just look them dead in the eye and say “I support your right to disagree with me, but do you think you should force my grandmother to die on the streets?” because that is what they were asking. When libertarians force down a government tit, all those who suckle from it are forced off and little old ladies like my memaw can’t go get a tech job in Silicon Valley. They are using force to take money away from my sweet ol’ granmammy.
What if they say “Yes!”?
Then they are demonstrating they are sociopaths who want nothing but the worse for your family and you should DeCOK them or Disassociate from one’s Clan Or Kin. They want your grandmother dead. Why would you want to hang out with someone who wants your family dead? How could you have someone tell you they want Memaw dead in the streets and then say to them “OK, let’s go play some XBOX.”? My god!
DeCOK Lolberts
So next time you see one of these jerks running around all smug with their facts and philosophy, just look in the eye and ask them if they want to force your grandma to die. If they say yes, get them out of your life and find new friends. Preferably find your new friends at the DNC convention when they nominate Clinton for their candidate.